Montreal Shootings, Bullying and Society

It wasn't that long ago that in the US we came to grips with school shootings and the polarization it created. Everyone blamed each other, we blamed Marilyn Manson, we blamed schools, we blamed parents, it became a flashpoint for many social and political critics, it demonized people and rather than finding solutions or trying to understand the why we focused on the who. In the docu-mockumentary of "Bowling For Columbine" by Michael Moore (and I'm not a Moore fan) the most poignat moment for me is what Marilyn Manson said if he had a chance to speak with the boys who killed their classmates and teachers what would he say, he replied "I wouldn't I'd listen to them." There in a nutshell a man demonized for his music and his appearence gave the simplist and real answer listen. It is unknown or clear if the Montreal gunman was troubled or just disillusioned and deluded in his mind with blood and glory he does make reference in his online profile that he "hated jocks for bullying".
Bullying happens everyday, you would think that over time it would stop but it doesn't. As children we knew there was a kid that was larger than the others and exhibited aggresive behaviour towards smaller than themselves. Early on we were seperated into groups, or cliques. The cool and the not, the jocks and the geeks, as we get older the seperation remains the same but unlike getting beat up in the playground adult bullying comes in forms of the workplace a boss, a co-worker who jokes or sabotages your work. We should ask ourselves with all honesty if we really take the time to listen and see and react. Somewhere along the way these kids decided that the only course of action was taking agun to school. Somewhere along the way we failed them by saying "its just kids being kids, they'll outgrow it" or "it builds character" or my personal favorite "it happens its not a big deal." It is a big deal its a big deal because we alienated a segment of the population by minimizing their emotions.
When I was in high school and alternative music exploded, Kurt Cobain gave voice to a generation of disenfranshised youths. Yet there were no school shootings then, what played on the fears of parents were their kids running away, commiting suicde or developing a drug problem. We fast forward to today and now we wonder if our kids will go postal on their classmates, thus not only ending their lives but the lives of the people they felt hurt them most. The easiest targets in high school were the quiet kids, the ones who were a little different maybe they prefered metal and not crunk, maybe they liked wearing black and not Abercrombie, maybe the liked Role PLaying Games and not football. Yet in the hierarchy in high schools its the "jocks" who get the atttention and praise, they get the homecoming queen and in result have the "alpha dog" mentality. Its only natural to pick on the secondary males namely said rpg kid. Over time the abuse the ridicule or worse the invisibility of themselves leaves them marginalized and isolated, they seek their coounterparts in school or in today's world the online community. They are inadated with games and movies and even music with violent themes, now its not Marilyn Manson's fault and anyone who believes that also believes that the death penalty will lower crime rates or that tougher drug laws will stop the drug problem in America which is just wrong. Marilyn Manson and artists like him do nothing but make music and entertain, if society actually listend to what they are saying and not what they want to hear perhaps it can shed light to kids who are left margiunalized and identify themselves with this kind of music. We dwell on Manson's look and what he portrays but noone pays attention to what he's saying or what he is trying to convey. We did what everyone did and demonized the two Columbine shooters and the those who came before and after them. We demonized the media and in the end it solved nothing. Kids are still being bullied and kids are still feeling marginalized.
There is no one simple answer and sadly it is the question of what if that will haunt us long after the memory of Montreal Columbine becomoes a footnote in history. The past tells us that there will be another school shooting there will be more heartaches to parents who outlived their children there will be more fingerpointing and demonizing and still no answer at the end of the day. The best place to start is to stop blaming and start listening to our kids, to others kids to what they are trying to say and can't say.
I pray for the familes in Montreal, I pray for the families in Columbine and all over, but more importantly I pray we learn from these tragedies.